I don't know how it happened. There was nothing and then it was there. Shane left my heart completely broken and I was hurt the most I had been in a long time. Shaly always says not to worry because there's always someone new. And that's always been true for me. For every bad relationship there has always been someone come out of no where and I'd fall for them. My periods of being single would only last a few weeks each time. I'm trying to avoid that happening again.
Yes, I will be single for quite a while this time probably. But I'm trying to not get caught up, especially in a relationship that is far fetched. Far fetched? But I can't help it this time. I am really genuinely happy. I feel like screaming and I'm staring off into the distance smiling. How can one guy just come out of no where and do this for me? Do I do it for him? I'm guessing so, since he sends me messages frequently (always one saying good morning...or after noon as its usually that time where he is), and tells others about me. We've attempted to exchange numbers although internationally that's incredibly difficult. And my laptop is rumored to be on its way, that way we can skype (holy cow and talk for the first time!), and he wants to visit the U.S. and has asked how I'd respond if he ever sent me an invitation to the U.K. Just when I'm starting to think it's all in my head he says "Fingers crossed can take you out for a bite to eat/swanky meal one day". And then those butterflies return. Still just a crush people, don't get your panties all in a mix. If this were to develop into a relationship can you imagine what it'd be like? Alex lives in a different time zone. In a different country with different rules. If he were to move to America, like he said he had been thinking about for a while, and if we were together, we'd have to move to a large city. No complaints here, but what future do I have if I can't make it as a cop? I will but there's strict health rules to just get into the academy. I don't want to disappoint anyone.
He seems too good to be true. Just like a Tracy.
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